Aap Kaa Surroor - The Moviee'

Plot Outline:
Aap Ka Surroor begins with a dead body of a TV journalist, Nadia Merchant, being found in a remote area, somewhere in Germany. Soon after this we are introduced to Himesh Reshammiya fondly branded HR by his close ones. He is an Indian rock star, at his concert he is arrested for murdering the television journalist. HR is put behind bars and the incidents begin to unravel as the movie goes into a flashback.

While on a concert in Germany, HR meets the event organizer (Darshan Jariwala) and his partner (Mallika Sherawat). He is all about the money & the profits and she is all about seducing him. HR shows no interest in return. As he meets the event planner (Hansika Motwani) on the other hand, its love at first sight. After initial reservations, Hansika's father (Sachin Khedekar) approves of the match.

Things take a turn when HR is arrested. He asks Mallika, also a lawyer, to bail him out. But hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Mallika once rejected by HR will do what she can so that HR's heart too is broken.

Overall Impressions:
Firstly you are thinking, why the hell is the word movie spelt wrong? Well, its no justification, but the reason behind it will be numerology. Us Indians can be quite superstitious, the fact that they play with Hindi words seems reasonable for the word Suroor & Surroor would sound the same anyway, but here we have it Movie also becomes moviee.

Moving on, let's be clear, there's only one real reason to watch this film, and it's not the marketing (the official website, even now that the film has been released, shows a 'website coming soon' picture), it will be no blockbuster of the year, the only curiosity that surrounds it is HR.

So a little about the man: A few years ago he emerged as a Music Director to our industry and a pretty good one. He then began singing in his own albums, this too received a warm response. He does have a very distinct voice. He recently staged a sellout music tour which included Wembley. Now he takes a monster step at attempting acting. Some are saying he'll be crap and he's let his arrogance get the better of him, some are saying he's taking a bold admirable step to achieve more.

The guy has a trademark style about him, he wears a cap pretty much at all times and sports a stubble. The way he holds the mic with the bottom facing upwards, and the black trench coat that he wears in concerts are also consistent elements of his style. They are maintained in the film also. The film is said to be inspired by his own life, emphasis probably lies in 'inspired', that's to say, it's definitely too unbelievable to be a biography.

So promptly answering the questions you actually care about ..
Can he act? Yes.
Does he take off his cap? Yes, briefly.
Do we see him without his cap? No.

He's not the next best action hero or superstar, but giving the dude credit where it's deserved, he stands tall considering it's his first film, at no point does he come off as amateur. His acting is real & unique, he doesn't appear to be attempting to mimic anyone else, which works to his advantage. His facial mannerisms at times remind you of Suniel Shetty, actually at points I did expect Suniel's voice to come on, alas it did not.

Well that's the man, now the film: Well it's okay upto a point, in fact interval point, the first half does hold up quite highly, credit probably should go to Hansika who's pretty and has a voice to match, that's right, it doesn't screech & to his friend (Shravan) who adds humour to the mix at the right points.

The second half on the other hand, with the over-the-top twists and turns are extremely off-putting. As HR begins to investigate the murder by himself, by breaking out of prison, the hitman taking out the murdered TV journalist's father (Raj Babbar) while conveniently being shot dead. The fact that HR has to find the actual murderer in one single day, or else his sweetheart will be married off to someone else, it all gets a bit silly, they even bring in 3 rickshaws from India to Germany to ensure it goes the full length to make it surreal, but you really don't care that much, for the above questions you went in with have been answered. Hopefully if he maintains a career in acting, he'll pick what to do by script. This hype of star power won't work again. Naturally the music for this film was composed by himself and was great, but that doesn't fix the terrible second half.

Possible moral of the story:
If you get framed for murder & end up in a jail cell with your jewellery & cap intact, seek advice from a lawyer that fancies you in the flashback, the one you peeved off, yep, that's the one, then break out anyway, just to show that you can. Sing religiously on the way out & have no fear, just faith and everything will work out, provided you keep your thinking cap on.

If you really want to see the guy 'act', because the possibility of him being able, raises much doubt & curiosity, then see it, but be warned there's little else in it. Personally I advise, get the soundtrack, skip the film - or walk away at intermission.

So this woman and (I suppose) her partner enter the arena that's in some way my second home. He takes a seat and she follows shortly, following this she mutters something to him, though entirely innocent I'm sure, my instant reaction is "What a bitch!" and I come to terms with my reason behind thinking this way, when I quanitify the facts logically.

She has an irritating voice. A screech that in my head shatters all the lenses and glass panes that could have existed. Not only could it deafen, this could blind you, that's how extreme the pitch is. The man in return mumbles something back in response, I hear the word shopping in there somewhere, then they both leave. I for one am certainly thankful.

The lady sitting adjacent and to my left, seems lost in some paperwork of her own as I write this up. She doesn't speak and in this way she is quite pleasant. She could have a good voice, the best even for all I know, but for now her silence is blissful.

It was only a matter of a few minutes before my inquisitive nature got the better of me. I ask a question with regards to her paperwork, for I want to know what her voice is like. I'm pleasantly surprised. It's also the first time I actually look at her, she's actually quite attractive, sporting a 'red' coat even though indoors & more importantly with a non-screechy voice.

The conversation doesn't really go much further, I merely get a few words and a smile out of her, but the suspense is over and the resolution as simple as it is, is a pleasant one.

A few minutes later, I leave as the battery on my laptop has come to it's inevitable low & well I still haven't got the power cord socket fixed so I can't recharge on the fly, I have to remove the battery and insert it into a battery charger (at home).

Awarapan'

Plot Outline:

Awarapan is the story of man called Shivam (Emraan Hashmi) who searched for joy but found nothing but pain and loneliness. It is the journey of a godless heartbroken lover who in order to escape from the ghosts of his tragic past dedicates himself to serve his gangster boss Malik who runs a chain of hotels in Hong Kong.

One day Malik asks Shivam to do an unusual job for him. He asks him to keep an eye on his young mistress Reema while he is away on a brief business trip. Reema is a young Pakistani girl who is a victim of human trafficking. Malik had 'bought' her in the flesh market in Bangkok.

The brief is clear if Reema is found cheating behind Malik's back Shivam has to eliminate her. From the moment Shivam sets his eyes on Reema, his frozen past begins to raise its head. He is reminded of his lost love and how he had failed to save it from a catastrophe.

And then one night Shivam is shocked to discover that the innocent looking Reema has a secret boyfriend, whom she has tucked away and is planning to run away with. Does Shivam remain loyal to Malik and execute his orders, or does he take on his wrath by daring to go against him. Will Shivam find redemption and faith or will this Godless vagabond remain shackled to his faithless dead past are the questions which is the life blood of this haunting tale.

Overall Impressions:
Yet another pretty decent hindi film that has such terrible marketing that it won't appeal out of it's already loyal following. The film isn't really a love story at all, it's about the black market of human trade, the redemption of a man based on his mysterious past and his journey towards finding faith. So okay the title is vaguely appropriate, the tagline really isn't & to be fair all of the posters seem to share this theme of the irrelevant tagline too.

Anyway, moving on to the actual film, Awarapan is a good example of what we see quite frequently in Bollywood. A film that above script, story & execution, holds its entertainment value by being a vehicle to the progression of an actor. It would be wrong not to see it as a vehicle for Emraan Hashmi.

I've mentioned before at some point, that this Colin Farrell equivalent of Mumbai seems to have made a name for himself over the past two or three years. Generally such quick progressions end up being at best the flavours of the month/year and little else, but this guy seems to be holding his ground pretty well. Even with mediocre looks for a star, his acting seems to be speaking for itself. All of the above said, this is not to say its a bad script, in fact it holds up pretty well, but perhaps it lacks some originality.

The opening scene, introduces us to a large consignment of women being sold, some dying in the poor travel arrangements made, one in particular almost escaping, as she gets caught & thrown back into the rest of the livestock, we have been enlightened of the theme of the film. Follow the opening credits.

The setup that follows is the introduction of Shivam as a short tempered hotel manager, who is a good person but clearly has his hands filled with the blood of many. He has been given a hotel to manage by Malik (Asutosh Rana) the owner of a huge chain of hotels, for whom Shivam's loyalty is unquestionable. Malik too favours Shivam's business decisions over his own son. In a drunken state one night, he requests from Shivam to spy on his young mistress Reema (Mrinalini Sharma) while he is away on a brief business trip, he has his doubts with regards to the exclusiveness of their relations. Shivam accepts the job and begins trailing her. As he watches her, he is reminded of his long lost love Aaliya (Shriya Saran).

Shifting into corresponding flashbacks here-on up to the turnaround plot point where he learns that Reema is actually a bought slave who has a boyfriend and plans to flee, these are probably the best portions of the film. We see parallels between Reema and Aaliya, their spiritualities & faith and how it troubles Shivam, even though he is an athiest.

Quite predictively, at this juncture when he is ordered to kill her by Malik for betraying him, he can not & ends up becoming her protector instead and it's all quite cliche'd. Performances and music makes it all appear fresh though. Kudos to Pritam for a superb soundtrack. The relationship between Malik & Shivam and the dilaogue between them also deserves a special mention.

The overall film as a package holds up, but it's pretty certain that it has many inspired moments from other films. The theme of the slave trade, the usage of the Taavees (Pendant of religious value) and character of Shivam seem lifted from the film Koyla (where Shah Rukh Khan played Shankar, a slave to Raja Saheb (Late. Amrish Puri). It's worth noting the names Shivam and Shankar also both come from a similar origin.

The idea of an athiest finding God in his time of crisis reminded me of Deewar (where Amitabh Bachchan would wait outside the temple each morning for his mother and brother as they regularly went to pray before going to work, reverted in the pre-climax of the film.) Even the opening scene that I described above reminded me of the climax of Leon in its execution.

The freeing of birds, seems lifted straight out of the (Shah Rukh Khan starrer) Ram-Jaane, as does the relationship between Shivam and his best friend, (Ram-Jaane and Murli) with the repeated mention by his friend of giving up his life for Shivam. It's got to be said, not everybody would be picking the film apart the way I just have done & so as I said, as a package, none of it seems out of place so I'd see them as observations rather than criticisms, but noticable observations none-the-less.

Possible moral of the story:

If some woman reminds you of some other woman you fancied, let the pigeons out, take up religion and a bunch of guns. The fact revealed in this all is that you are the ultimate hero now. There is nothing for you to lose, so you may as well go about sporting a leather jacket some kick-ass shades and shooting bad guys. I mean what else is there to life?

Enjoyable entertainer, with a surprisingly mature performance by Emraan Hashmi for such a newbie in the industry, and an engaging story that you've seen before, but don't mind seeing again, because of the refreshing soundtrack and performances. Not a must, but a fair entertainer worth your money, if you do.

Lucky You'

Plot Outline:
Billie Offer (Drew Barrymore) is a young singer from Bakersfield with more heart than talent. Huck Cheever (Eric Bana) is a poker player whose emotions at the table often undermine his exceptional skill, especially when he is heads up with his father, poker legend L.C. Cheever (Robert Duvall). The one aptitude Billie and Huck seem to share is a knack for reading people—the difference is what they do with that gift.

While Huck’s instincts enable him to take advantage of his opponents at the poker table and expertly avoid both emotional connections and long-term commitments in his personal life, Billie uses her intuition to see the emotional truth of those around her and sympathize with their pain. When these two meet, the real game begins. If Huck is going to win Billie’s heart, he must learn to play cards the way he has been living life and live his life the way he has been playing cards.

Overall Impressions:

From the writer in me, I could see in the opening scene where Huck barters at the pawn shop, that they were giving many lines to him and very little to her, conventionally this doesn't happen in scripts. Every rule of thumb is however to be exploited when used under the right circumstances & this certainly was one of those cases. Even before we see a hint of the multiple poker games to follow, we learn one thing about the hero, he knows how to read people. For me this was it, first 5 minutes, sold. I like this guy, he's cool.

Further setup over the next half hour or so gets the leading lady and the father into their respective positions for what is to follow, and it all goes pretty smoothly. They don't get too carried away, explaining or even showing each and every card dealt, yet manage to keep you interested.

Moving on, the way Huck loses money & manages to find ways to replinish his funds through obscure bets, pawning & borrowing, does reflect his skill and build around the character weaknesses they've built for us. It's a good balance between an emotionally involved human being & a skilled poker player.

Where the balance perhaps isn't so greatly achieved is where our hero here seems to take each and every word the leading lady says as extremely profound and personal, but this is one of the things about chick flicks, you either find this balance or you don't & that's the crux of whether or not it will work. To quite a degree, the chick-flick aspect, for me at least, didn't work. The chemistry between Eric Bana & Drew Barrymore, zilch. That said, the remainder of the plot, the poker tournament and the strange father-son relationship was definitely a good enough storyline to keep you interested.

It's definitely a major advantage to have multiple such plots weaving into each other which would appeal to a different audience, yet another hard balance to strike, juggling them all and doing justice to them, but this is where the film scores well. In the battle of finding balances between subplots and prioritising them accordingly, the house wins.

It was good to see a small cameo from Robert Downey Jr. as Huck's friend, you almost expect him to be held back, for a crucial plot point in the story, alas - the art of deflection.

The resolution of the plot is fitting and uplifting, partly predictable but I was happy with what they did, none the less.

Amongst the heavy flow of Ultra-Mega-Mega Super-duper blockbusters this summer, I regularly find that if I pop to the cinemas, these films that slot in around them are the better films. A thought that did cross my mind was it can't have cost all that much, Huck plays cards through a lot of it, has no furniture at home (all pawned off we can assume), he even wears the same jacket throughout the entire film, but it just goes to show big money doesn't guarantee a good film, a decent script does.

It doesn't seem to have hit the screens with a huge publicity around it and perhaps this explains the little hype and expectation surrounding it and so I'll say, though probably not a cinema must, if you've seen the big ones and find there's little else on, or really don't want to see the big ones to avoid the huge disappointments they can be, this is a safe bet. (hehe.. I said bet)

Possible moral of the story:
Gambling can be addictive, this guy only did it because he wanted to beat daddy at it, besides it's okay for him for he was extremely skilled, and had a chick to keep his life moving in the right direction, the money was just a way of keeping score.

So don't go out there borrowing money and betting kids, firstly because you'll never get this skilled unless you study hard, and secondly because you'll probably end up in huge debt & you're not expected to do that until you study hard & go through Graduation. :-D

A nice, simple, yet entertaining chick flick with some cool poker games. Alternatively, a film about a kickass poker player, playing against his 2-time champion father, also with a romantic interest thrown in. Whichever appeals. I would recommend it.

Fong Juk - (Exiled)'

Plot Outline
The time is 1998. The setting is Macau. Every living soul jumps at every chance to make quick money before the Portuguese colony ushers in a new era under the Chinese rule. For the jaded hit men, they wonder where this journey will end. Against this backdrop come two hit men from Hong Kong sent to take out a renegade member trying to turn over a new leaf with his wife and newborn baby. They soon find themselves in the throes of a dilemma when two of their former associates also show up, intent on thwarting them at every cost.

Overall Impressions:
Breaking it down, the film is about childhood friends who joined the world of crime and gangs together, time has passed, the friends have parted and now it has come down to this. One friend wanting out, Two protecting him & Two out of orders sent to kill him. The crux of the film is they are still friends. The shooutout at his flat followed by them sitting down having dinner all together displays the emotions behind the action with finesse.\n\nThe mark, understands that he has to die, and the hitmen out to get him are reasonable with him as they are merely friends with different agendas and priorities. He asks that he be allowed a day to put together some money so his family can survive after he is gone, they agree. So, the mark, the 2 hitmen & the 2 protectors go to the seedy Jeff''s Hotel seeking a quick and lucrative job for him. Into the mix gets tied the gang boss who ordred the hit, a ton of gold and a can of Red Bull.

It would be fair to say that some scenes feel inspired by the infamous mexican stand-off''s seen in Westerns, but whether it be based on something else or not, aspiring to do a good job of it and actually achieving it are not always achieved. Fortunately throughout this film, they both certainly are. You will probably take home with you the scene with the sniper protecting the gold and the red bull can scene, but it''s safe to say the rest is merely a notch behind.

This is by far the best action film I have seen this year. It has a balance of humour, action and style that resembles what Tarantino aims for, but only partly achieves. A must see for any action fan. Another DVD pre-order for me.

Ne le dis à personne (Tell No One) Written & Directed by: Guillaume Canet - Runtime: 130min 51sec

Plot Outline
Based on the novel by Harlan Coben, the film follows the story of a Pediatric Alex (François Cluzet), devastated since his wife Margot (Marie-Josée Croze) was savagely murdered in the early days of their marriage eight years earlier, receives an anonymous email: when he clicks on the link indicated, he sees a woman's face standing in a crowd and being filmed in real time. It is Margot's face.

Is she still alive? And why does she instruct him to tell no one? A couple of so many such questions that our hero will not have time to consider: he barely even has time to raise the lid of his Pandora's box before the police reopen the case of her murder, and though eight years down the line, the cops are determined that he will take the rap it.

Overall Impressions
When Hollywood makes thrillers of this nature, they are either original & gripping like say The Fugitive or are mediocre films that resemble the above such as say more recently The Sentinel. Ofcourse this can be subjective depending on what you saw first, etc however this foreign film (French with English Subtitles), I would say rests comfortably with the advantages of both. It isn''t so ground-breaking that all attention leans upon it as the template for future thrillers, yet it manages to come of feeling fresh by the way it is put across, thus grasping you to feel what you felt when you caught one of those ''original'' thrillers.

This is no bad thing but François did remind me almost throughout of Dustin Hoffman, or perhaps a cross between him and Adrien Brody & it was interesting to find that Richard had the same thing to say over at Filmstalker about the guy.

The film keeps you interested and second guessing throughout while there is enough comic relief to keep the overall mood level. The pace is a little slow, however the time is utilised wisely focussing on the smaller things that make scenes and characters more real. A much better substitute to Hollywood''s explosions and special effects.

The background music was effective, however I did find it a ittle odd that they used English speaking songs rather than French ones, perhaps they were merely observing the emotion of the music, though that said, the words did fit the scenes too.

As the story moves on and all is revealed, I felt the resolution comes as a surprise but not quite a shock. A surprise in that, someone who has little been mentioned has a larrge part in what occured those 8 years ago, so I wasn''t too pleased with that resolution, but following this there was a small lie thrown in to deflect you from a further tiwst in the tale & this was handled better.

Overall, I did enjoy this as a thriller, it''s a notch above what you get to see these days and based on that I recommend it.

Rise of the Silver Surfer'

Plot Outline
Marvel's First family of super heroes. The Fantastic Four, meets their greatest challenge yet in Rise of the Silver Surfer as the enigmatic, intergelactic herald, The Silver Surfer (Laurence Fishburne), comes to Earth to prepare for it's destruction. As the Silver Surfer races around the globe wreaking havoc, Reed, Sue, Jhnny and Ben must unravel the mystery and confront the surprising return of their mortal enemy, Dr. Doom before all hope is lost.

Overall Impressions:
Was a mediocre sequel to a mediocre film, so it maintains it credibility in my books, but it's nothing spectacular. I'm glad it's not taking itself seriously. It resembled the Scooby-Doo movie at a point, which was amusing & I guess it is makes sense, after all it is a kid's film, it's a good thing that at least one comic book film is sticking to it's roots in that sense.

The Mr. & Mrs. Fantastic marriage fiasco stating multiple attempts have already failed due to last minute emergencies shows that it is all a bit of a laugh and a joke.

What I will say was a disappointment is the presence of the Silver Surfer. No, I'm not saying he was crap, I'm just saying you don't really see him much & when you do, he's well -- merely surfing. I don't know this character well, and this may be the reason behind it but I just found him a bit plain. He doesn't do much.

It was good to see Dr. Doom back but again he has such a short stay it just seems wasted. In fact, thinking about it, the whole film seems a bit too focussed on this wedding, not that it's a bad thing, but I can see how it may disappoint people's expectations.

What can't be faulted as with the first film is the Human Torch, he has the best one-liners & the best effects surrounding him, whether it'll keep the kids interested enough to watch it all is I guess the big question. My guess: Not really.

It's not a 'bad' film, but it's easily missable. You won't regret it either way. Just don't expect great things because Morpheus is in it. ;-)

Jhoom Barabar Jhoom Runtime: 131min 52sec - Directed by: Shaad Ali Sangal - Screenplay by: Habib Faisal

Plot Outline:
Busy London station. Delayed train from Birmingham. Two strangers waiting for the train... Rikki Thukral (Abhishek Bachchan) born in Bhatinda, living in London; and Alvira Khan (Preity Zinta) more Brit than the Queen herself with Lahori blood in her veins.

Crowded café. One table to share. Two hours to kill. Perfect setting for the start of a love-story. Hitch? Both Rikki and Alvira are engaged and have come to pick up their fiancés who are coming by train. To kill time, they end up telling each other their "how I met my fiancé" stories.

Stories unfold, time passes, the two strangers start enjoying each other. That Alvira is a Pakistani Brit and Rikki originally from India... that Rikki is crooked, earthy, and rakish: dabbler in various businesses; that Alvira is prim-n-proper, wannabe blue-blood, stiff upper-lip: Asst. Manager at House of Fraser’s... none of these details matter. They have gotten alarmingly attracted to each other.

Their brief encounter has created a complicated quadrangle... Rikki Thukral and Alvira Khan have gotten themselves and Steve (Bobby Deol) and Anaida (Lara Dutta) into a lovely mess... To get out of it both of them bend over backward, thinking quickly on their feet, dancing around each other’s emotions... After all when you’re playing musical chairs with love, there’s nothing you can do but Jhoom Barabar Jhoom. (Sway, Dance, Groove, etc)

Overall Impressions:
Well, despite the fact that it involves 2 trains from different destinations delayed by the same time, or is it the same train via Birmingham & France? and let's forget that one of the trains coming from the Midlands yet arriving at London Waterloo (South-West London), even with these totally inaccurate train routes, it manages to entertain, obvioulsy on the condition we suspend our logical side of the brain.

Besides having the Big B grooving away at Waterloo station with the coolest jacket & hat is worth the full ticket price of admission as far as I am concerened, and a lot of people will agree with me. After all, there was very little known about the film in the early days of promotion yet it still picked up quite a hype. Why? Awesome catchy title song in the TV spots. Simple as that.

Well moving on, after the Big B's groovy opening credits, the entire first half covering the stories of how they met their respective fiancés is over-played with a surrealism and high cheese quotient, but seriously having a look at the plot synopsis, did you expect any less?

The second half is quite a bit weaker, since once the plot unfolds, you begin to realise that actually there is little plot. The plot holes are acres larger than the plot, yet in some strange way, it's justified. Why? To a large extent the 'plot' of the first half is one big predictable prank played on the viewer & so you begin to care very little about the ongoings. That said, the ongoings are highly humourous, and at frequent enough junctures to keep you watching (even if you no longer care how it will unfold).

Largely I will say this credit goes to Abhishek Bachchan's performance who keeps you entertained and comes away with the strongest impact with his crooked character of Rikki. He also seems to pair well with Priety & I can see this being repeated in future Yashraj Productions. Bobby Deol & Lara Dutta do well for themselves when on-screen, but their parts are actually quite miniscule on the grand scale. Thankfully they make their presence felt through the songs, for if they didn't, it would have been quite unfair, as you really just wouldn't have seen them at all.

With a little plot & huge plot holes, this somehow manages to break convention & still entertains. I assume this will largely be due to the surrealness, excessive cheese, strong comic performances & must-tap-your-feet soundtrack. Though I wouldn't call it a formula for success, more a fluked balance, it seems magically to work.

Hallam Foe

Plot Outline:
Based on the novel by Peter Jinks, Hallam Foe is a story about a 17-year-old misfit (Jamie Bell).

Hallam's talent for spying on people reveals his darkest fears - and his most peculiar desires. Driven to expose the true cause of his mother's death, he instead finds himself searching the rooftops of the city for love.

Hallam Foe is a boy haunted by the enigma of his mother's death. Did she drown herself, or was she pushed? Hallam has evidence which he believes implicates Verity (Claire Forlani) his alluring, feline step-mother. Yet his own methods for uncovering secrets are no less devious. From his treetop hideout, or sneaking through his father's decasing Scottish mansion, Hallam spies on people. Most of all he spies on Verity, and the more he becomes obsessed with her guilt, the more his attraction to her grows. When Verity confronts him, Hallam is helpless to resist her seductive power. his only resort is to flee the family nest.

Alone and penniless, Hallam leaves the Scottish Highlands and crashes down into reality. But as he wanders the unforgiving streets of Edinburgh, he discovers another use for his peculiar skill. Catching a glimpse of Kate (Sophia Myles), a young woman who looks uncannily like his mother, he follows her back to the hotel where she works, and talks his way into a job. Life begins to look up for Hallam. By day he discovers friends amongst social outcasts, and by night he does what he loves best - clambering over the city roofs, spying on people in all their hilarious strangeness. The city is a realm of glimmering allure, and Hallam is it's freaky spiderman.

Exploring the high-clock of the hotel, he finds a new hideaway from where he can watch Kate at home in her rooftop apartment, gazing through her window with his binoculars. But Hallam's bittersweet visions are shattered when he discovers Kate is embroiled in a seedy liasion with the hotel manager. What happens from here, forms the crux of the story.

Prologue:
Before beginning, many thanks go to Stephen Naughton (from Beatwax) for inviting Filmstalker to this advanced screening of Hallam Foe in London. Firstly I should probably mention this is based on a book I haven't read, and so naturally I'll be making no comparison. My perception here is entirely upon the film put in front of me, and you all know how much I love it when that happens. So here goes ..

Review:
As we are introduced to Hallam as he pervs upon a couple with a pair of binoculars from his tree-house, we are thrown straight into his strange little world. It takes a little while to get used to the principal character and his quirks, his hunchback walk and introverted personality seem too weird to be the 'hero', after all, the main character needs to be someone you can relate to and initially this doesn't quite seem the case, but this is no bad thing.

We familiarise ourselves first with his actions, and as the plot develops, we get to grips with the thought behind it and the way he thinks. It burns down to his defences, the way he is socially quite inept. His means of social endeavour is to watch from afar, before taking any such risk as to communicate with people. A lot of the time he is simply satisfied with watching.

Though initially his actions may come off as intrusive, disrespectful of privacy and all-round devious, we soon get to see the innocence of it all. His actions are more akin to a child not familiar with an object and prodding it with a stick. Convincing the audience of this is where I would say this film scores well.

As far as character development for the remainder of the characters is concerened, they are a little too vague, Hallam seems to have got all the attention, which keeps the focus on him, however this makes the actions of others difficult to digest at times. In particular, Kate (Sophia Myles) seemed to suffer from this most. As a distraction, she is beautiful and acts the part very well, but this doesn't fix the issue that the way she reacts to Hallam's actions seem too devoid of realistic doubt and suspicion. How much of this was in the hands of the film-makers, (bearing in mind is a novel adaptation) is difficult to tell, but it does stand out.

So the writing has its share of positives and negatives, some of which may have been unavoidable, putting this aside and moving on to the visuals of the film. Here I can safely say the work done is optimal, it didn't jump out at me straight away, but once Hallam shifts to the city, we see the contrast between the scenery straight away, in addition the director manages find a good balance between capturing the beauty of the city as well as the more hostile and intimidating environment that a stranger might find themselves in.

As we start following him around rooftops, the camera work does a great job of making it appear that he has no problems getting around up there, and also a shocking view of how high up he actually is. As the viewer we get to see with him downwards to the possible fall, if he were to slip up.

The multiple times that Hallam is hanging outside Kate's loft window, fits the familiarity that we've learnt about Hallam's watching habits and it doesn't jump out as abnormal by this point, (though I feel it may read that way). What is interesting is how each instance that we see him there is a different situation, some quite comic I might add. The dialogue throughout adds a layer of humour that has been carefully weaved into the scenes too. This is a definite huge plus on the writing side. Some of the witty jokes remain most memorable after the show is over.

The character of Hallam is definitely the most intense of the lot and Jamie Bell has done a great job bringing that to life. There is no disputing, he's the star of the show, but credit should certainly also be given to the remainder of the cast for working around him so well. The character of Raymond (Maurice Roeves) as Hallam's fellow colleague in the hotel kitchen is certainly worth a special mention. He adds a level of humour to the ongoings, ensuring the viewer isn't feeling too untoward when the plot is getting heavy. Ewen Bremner gets a similar function later on, as Hallam gets transitioned to a better job.

So by the end of the film we expect some kind of resolution for a number of situations that have been put before us. I'm not really sure what I expected at this point, but what I got was not entirely satisfactory. The situation with Kate is resolved spot on, based on what little we've learnt about her this seems entirely feasible. However going back to the reasons he has run away from home, the resolution seemed to be somewhat forced dramatic. I won't go and ruin it for you, and though the end outcome of the events is appropriate and fitting, it seems they felt it lacked drama and then pumped it through with some. This part may just be me though.

Overall conclusions, It's a well made film, even with the small shortcomings, the character of Hallam is interesting, the performances are top-notch, the direction is spot on, the camera work is appropriately fitting, even the background music is very good, yet it seems to lack something in its overall appeal. If I were to take a wild stab in the dark to suggest what that might be, I'll say that I think it's just not a subject that everybody will be interested in or comfortable with. My advice if you're in two minds about watching this, would be to read over the synopsis and watch it if what you read catches your fancy.

Well, that's my two and a half cents on the film, but wait there's more:
Following the screening there was a Q&A session with Director (David McKenzie), and stars (Jamie Bell and Sophia Myles). Okay though it started as a Q&A session, but it soon was more like a bit of a chat between the press audience and the presenters, most of the questions were vague and answers likewise, but I did make some notes and I'll cover what I learnt.

Q. (to David) - Why did you want to make 'this' movie?
A. Principally because the character of Hallam was interesting, an outcast, weird and following the process of rehabilitating him.

Q. (to Jamie) - What was the hardest part of playing this character?
A. Getting to grips with the first few pages of the script. He's arrogant, a posh bastard, a pervert, disrespectful to his elders. Why would we like him? Answering the question, I guess approaching the character, getting to like him was initially hard. I learn though that coming to terms with a loss of a parent would be tough, I guess it can result in putting lipstick around your nipples.

Q. (to Sophie) - How did you get the part?
A. I read the script and was familiar with David's work. I practically begged him to give me the part, I wrote him a card and a letter.
A. (David takes over) .. I wouldn't say begged, we met up, had a coffee, talked over the script, but you do this kind of thing all the time, it can get rather de-personalised, I think it was nice that she then followed it up with a nice letter saying she really liked the script and would like to do it.

Q. (to David) The relationship between Kate and Hallam was quite ambiguous. Was it intended this way?
A. Well yea, the film spans over 3 weeks, we wanted to be realistic about it.

Q. (to All) The internet has become a tool for yourselves to work with the civilian audiences, has this made things easier or harder as a process?
A. (Sophia) Well the first shock I had was identity fraud, I tried setting up a myspace account only to find there already is one, with a picture of me and it even states that "I like creepy guys", taken straight from this film. -- I asked her personally later and she wants to clarify that she doesn't actually like creepy guys :)
A. (Jamie) It's great, imdb is practically your resume avaialble to anyone anywhere, myspace, ipod trailers, it's what its all about, I mean 'fuck billboards', if you want someone to know about what you're selling, put it on your myspace frontpage and a million people can see it instantly.

Following Q&A there were snack and drinks, where we all mingled and discussed, likes and dislikes in films, the weather, the internet and well the atmosphere was very down to earth. This really did surprise me, I expected them to be more stuck up if I'm honest. Lastly but certainly not least I'd like to say thanks to Richard for putting myself forward as a fellow Filmstalker representative at this elite preview screening. It was a great evening. I even got my picture taken with Jamie Bell :)

After discussing at length how the Swanky New Starbucks across the road actually stays open til 9 rather than 7, we came to terms with a certain factor of guilt attached to shifting to the other side, since it would be on some level betraying our befriended staff at Nero. There doesn't really seem to be a logical reason behind it except perhaps stepping out of a comfort zone that we have created.

Funnily the same day this dicussion was had, I found out that one of the Staff members has taken this step, moved jobs. Their explanation was hilarious in itself, they said the "work was much easier and enjoyable". All the more reason to take a peek at the other side, but let's face it, we have a good relationship with the people here & they do reward our loyaly by double & ocassionally triple stamping our 'Loyalty' cards. Starbucks don't reward us, they don't even do loyalty cards, they do starbucks cards, which hold our money from which they can earn further interest, yet we do wonder about across the road, do they have more accesible power points, more comfortable chairs, friendlier staff, reflective people like ourselves?

So yesterday morning my car gets clamped, not for my shennanigans at the shopping centre car park on occasion, but for merely sitting in the parking bay outside my flat. Had I been driving to work each day I'd have been fuming, thankfully I get the train.

What I wasn't happy about is that I had to pay £99 to get it unclamped while it was in no way my fault. The backstory (still to be confirmed by Landlord) is such: The Parking Permit for the residence is updated every few months & I hadn't received mine due to the lettings department sending them to my Landlord rather than myself (which doesn't seem logical but), fair enough.

So I'm informed I should try & get the Parking Permit & my £99 from the Landlord, now here's the hitch. I can't seem to get hold of them. They're probably on holiday, which again is reasonable, it's not like they are barred from going away being Landlords, but it leaves me a bit stuck. The letting agents have held my car details so it doesn't get clamped again in the next week, but I have my concerns.

Ocean's Thirteen Directed by: Steven Soderbergh - Screenplay by: Brian Koppelman and David Levien Tagline: What are the odds of getting even? Thirteen to One. - Runtime: 121min 57sec

Plot Outline:
When Reuben Tishkoff (Elliott Gould) makes the mistake of building a hotel with one of Las Vegas’ most hated businessmen, Willy Bank (Al Pacino), he gets cut out of the deal and ends up in the hospital after a heart attack. "He made the right choice," Willy says, "Roll over and die."

Danny Ocean (George Clooney) tries to help his old friend out by requesting Bank to restore Reuben’s share of the hotel, but Bank dismisses him without any regard.

Six months later, with Bank's investment thriving as the richest hotel in the city and the ultimate spot for high rollers, Ocean and his crew have put into motion their plan to bring him down. With the help of their former nemesis, casino owner Terry Benedict (Andy Garcia), who is also out to settle the score against Bank, his fierce rival, they scheme to find a way to bankrupt Bank on his casino’s opening night. This time, they are not in it for the money, but rather for revenge.

Overall Impressions:
I probably wouldn't have even noticed the missing women, if they hadn't made it so damned obvious that they were not around. It does stick out in the opening a bit, how they specifically point this out, yet it's forgivable. Moving on ..

What I feel it lacked was precisely what it was sold as, revenge. The heist genre is something that was redefined for this day and age by these guys, they made a great team, I can see that it would thus be credible for them to have the whole, mess with 'one' you mess with them 'all' and so I was on board, despite Ocean's 12, I figured, this can work. Does it? Well sort of.

The usual, creating a framework, finding obstructions and dealing with them accordingly is done magnificiently, and the jokes, though few and far between do work well, even with the slight immaturity found in them, (the nose for example), but it's the rest that I think seems to fall apart. The emotion behind the vengeance served, just wasn't felt, actually in the end I thought actually Bank (Al Pacino) may be humiliated but he hasn't been ruined, so it's actually not that big a deal to him, so I'm not really sure if there was any point to it all.

Also, I would have liked to see Reuben have a moment in the climax, as opposed to merely get out of sick-mode to simply normal. The whole success celebration seemed a mirror of previos such wins, a stare into the sky, with No.11 and the fountains, it wasn't merely slick, it actually felt like a win, this one somehow manages to lack that.

The actors all refill the shoes of characters they know pretty well, no complaints there, except Al Pacino who seems a bit of a wasted talent here. He scowls and delivers his lines like a true gangster, but that's about it. Not his fault, it's just a very small part for such a seasoned star. Garcia manages to amuse in his minor part.

The background music is of superior quality as with the prior two films, modern day Jazz, with a tinge of the old school Jazz too, Bongos that remind you of the old Mission Impossible TV Series, (as do the posters now that I think about it.) All round production is pretty decent. The film ends with "See you when I see you" ..I'm hoping they pack it in, maybe a reunion film in 10 years or so that is well written & thought out, until then.

Watchable, with a few moments that make you smile, but to no degree unmissable. If you saw Twelve and were thoroughly disappointed you may watch it to make up for that, in which respect it succeeeds, but even so you'd be better of just watching Eleven again.

Hitcher, The'

Plot Outline
A road trip takes a deadly turn in this terrifying thriller about a young couple (Sophia Bush and Zachary Knighton) tormented by a psychotic hitchhiker (Sean Bean) who forces them to face their fears head-on. The open road becomes a battleground of blood and metal in the race to reveal the chilling truth about this relentless killer. No one knows who he is, what he's after, or how to stop this 'truly twisted' villain.

A remake of an 80's flick written by Eric Red of the same title, it's a simple story about a nutcase hitchhiker who goes round killing people with no real explanation, as to be honest, none needed.

(Not seen the original, hence no comparison made, any of you readers seen it?, apparently there is even a sequel.)

Overal Impressions:
I thoroughly enjoyed it. Sitting sniffing my cold away on my own, it helped kill an hour and-a half & that's precisely how I'd describe it, a good time-killing film. It's a jumpy and brainless thriller. No explanation, just the ongoing taunting until the very end & in that way, it's actually flawless. Sean Bean seems to suit the role with total ease and in fairness he's the only character that mattered, not that the others are bad.

Most memorable moment was from Sean Bean as he gets questioned about why he's been killing people & it's the expression on his face when he says it with a shrug "Why not?", also the last expression in the film he pulls of total disgust is highly amusing if you see it.

Is it this summer's blockbuster, that you have to see? No. Is it a decent flick though? Hell yea'. For a short and simple thriller, it fits the bill & does what it says on the tin. Recommended.

Amongst much catching up & discussions over the weekend with my old chums back in the town of Mini-India (Leicester), I also came across a discovery that made my day, nobody, I repeat nobody expressed the same level of excitement as myself, but now there is 1 more reason to hang out at Cafe Nero, besides the Dark & White Chocolate Cheesecake, The Chocolate cake with huge chocolate chunks, the latte's, the napkins that I've been using to deal with the man flu (that the Dead Farmer gave me), the friendly staff, the fellow writer types, et al & that is .. now they serve Victoria Spongecake .. & it is sweeeet!

As for the Tiramisu thing, that's going to get a post of it's own Charlie, I feel yourz pain, I truly do, I'll never forgive your girlfriend for this, even if you find it in your heart to, I never will!!!!

Cheeni Kum'

Plot Outline
Cheeni Kum is a romantic comedy with less sugar.
Less sugar means less mush.

It is a sarcastic love story of a 64 year old arrogant, acidic chef (Amitabh Bachchan) of London's top Indian restaurant and a simple 34 year old unmarried woman (Tabu), visiting London. It's a story of how they meet, how they fight, how they make up, how their relationship evolves into romance. It's a story of their funny struggle to break the news to the woman's father (Paresh Rawal) and the chaos they go through convincing him and making him accept them as a couple.

Overal Impressions:
For a debutante writer/director, this is amazing work. It certainly helps that it has the most seasoned starcast, but it has to be said, standing even taller than the Big B himself are the witty dialogues behind it all. The dialogue throughout is sarcastic and bitter, yet sweet. The narrative wastes no time getting on with it.

From the very introduction of the character of the chef, where he is explaining that the cuisine is an art far more complex than the art of the galleries, (as it draws your eyes, smell & taste, not merely your eyes -- fair point), you can see he's a bitter ole bugger who takes his job too seriously because he has no other life. Interrupting his passionate speel, a dish is returned to the kitchen for being too sweet, the chef's ego is fuming. He takes the dish right back out and has a go at the customer explaining that his kitchen knows how to do their job -- naturally the customer is to become his out of work life.

The chemistry between the two as the first half progresses is fluid, at no point do you see the age difference being an issue throughout their scenes. The subtle touches like the ongoing return of the umbrella as an excuse to meet again is funny yet quite believable. The point where you find out their names is a key moment that makes you think, wow, this isn't quite normal.

The other characters like the kitchen crew and the little girl next door all play their part and compensate for the bitterness of the chef, even his mother (Zohra Sehgal) convincing him to go to the gym everyday is pleasant banter you come to find in such households, it allows you to see where he gets it from. It all concentrates on the chef & his world until intermission point where it is decided that he must ask her hand from her father in New Delhi.

Meet the father, 6 years younger than our bachelor yet whining of old-age pains and troubles, you get the picture .. It's definitely not your everyday romantic comedy, in fact just as the opening of the synopsis suggests, it's far less mush & this is where it shoots and it scores!!

With all the banter turning to romance, there seemed to be a lot of innuendo and even more direct references to sex that surprised me, no, not because Indian films are backwards and such things are totally forbidden, (that's just a myth, that ocassionally gets a media stint of attention thus re-focussing upon it), but because it's been rated a PG. I'm thinking somebody isn't doing their job right. Yes BBFC, what I am saying is, give me the job, I'd be good at it ;-).

For the exceptional sarcastic dialogue, if not the many other postive aspects, this is one of the must watch films of this year. Not necessarily a cinema-must, but a DVD buy rather than rent. You'll probably want to see this again, I know I do. (Pre-ordered)

OUR CITY, OUR RULES

Pakis. Rajamuffins. Britasians. Rudeboys. Desis. Whatever we are, the other guys are better at being it than I am. I swear I got the same fones that they got but I still look like a gimp.’

Meet Jas. Obsessed with designer clothes, sculpted facial hair, protein shakes and pretending he lives in the ghetto rather than his overbearing mum’s five-bedroom house in Hounslow.

No matter how much Jas tries, though, it isn’t enough to sleep with seriously fit Samira or convince hard-man Harjit. Then Sanjay – a proper player with a Knightsbridge penthouse and a Porsche – offers him a deal he can’t resist. But will Jas be man enough to pay the price for his borrowed bad-boy image…

Thing is, if people like Davinder hadn’t laid into me so much all the time, Hardjit’d never have started stickin up for me in the first place. An if he’d never stuck up for me, I’d probly never’ve become part a his crew. At first I figured the only reason he’d started backing me up was so he could act like Shah Rukh Khan in front a all the ladies. The Bollywood hero always takes care a the underdog, you see. Only difference was Hardjit din’t like takin no glory for stickin up for me. He din’t even like it whenever I thanked him for doing so. I reckon he was basically so freaked out by how gimpy I was that he felt he’d got to cure me. Like those people who are so homophobic that stead a beating gay guys shitless, they actually try an turn em into straight guys.

"The thing is, I know I don't stand a chance with you, but I was wondering whether you'd mind if I chat you up anyway so that you'll agree to gout out to dinner with me next Saturday?"

Proud a me? You fuckin should be. I practised that line a hundred times in front a my bedroom mirror an a hundred fuckin times in front a the bathroom mirror. Sometimes I practised it as Johnny Depp, sometimes as Pierce Brosnan, sometimes as Brad Pitt. But in the end I went with a cross between Andy Garcia an Shah Rukh Khan coz it just worked for me. Samira came back with a reply that she'd obviously been practising herself, only I figured she probly din't practise her lines in front a the mirror. Probly she practised it in front a all te other guy's who'd asked her out.

Naturally I decide to pick out the two quotes that reference Shah Rukh Khan as the highlights of the book, but really this is merely a small sample of the book, while reading it I had too many snippets I considered amusing and worthy of mention that in the end I ditched them all.

Rightly getting a lot of credit for this debut novel Gautam Malkani gives quite an in-depth insight into a large subset of the younger British Asian generation, in fact this described a large chunk of people I went to college with. I considered them the losers (Desi-Chavs) but this novel gives a more in-depth look at the families behind them and how it's partly how their defenses are playing out.

I won't go into detail, but while reading this book all through I felt this could be made into a film, (as I do with most novels these days), but in the end I decided this wouldn't be a good idea. If you read it you'll see why. This is the first novel I've read that has made me double guess myself and forced me to read it again, pretty much as soon as I finished it. In fact apart from those Spot the Dog books back at school, this will be the first book I've read twice, so I have to give it large credit for making me do that.

It finds a great sense of humour that will appeal to most as you'll probably find in the extracts given, but is the novel flawless though? I'd say no. Firstly because it's language includes a lot of Desi (countryman) terminology that may be unfamilair to the non-asian readers. A good effort has been made to clarify a lot of such terminology but not all. Not necessarily a flaw per say but it cuts down the audience that it could have otherwise been aimed towards. The flaw I found was that at points the language got a bit repetitive, much swearing for emphasis and that sort of thing. Rudeboys do speak this way and it does fit to a degree, but it can get a bit much I thought. I've lent the book to a fellow (non-asian) writer friend & am interested to see how he finds it.

All said and done, I had picked up the novel knowing absolutely nothing about it, it's acclaim or it's author, simply because it sounded interesting, minor blemishes aside, I would say it's a masterpiece in it's own right & I'd certainly look out for his future works.

Fool 'N' Final Runtime: 144min 8sec - Directed by: Ahmad Khan Screenplay by: Umesh Shukla & Abbas Hirapurwala Tagline:Stealing Stones 'N' Breaking Bones Cast: Sunny Deol, Om Puri, Sharmila Tagore, Shahid Kapoor, Ayesha Takia, Paresh Rawal, Vivek Oberoi, Arbaaz Khan, Jackie Shroff, Chunky Pandey, Sameera Reddy, Zakir Hussain, Johny Lever

Plot Outline:
A slick diamond robbery takes place in India. The robber is none other than Rocky (Chunky Pandey) whos the nephew of Chowksi (Gulshan Grover), a Don based in London. Chowksi tells Rocky to sell the diamond to his brother Lalwani (Asrani) in Dubai. Lalwani is a dealer of smuggled gems and jewellery. But he warns Rocky to stay away from guns and gambling, which is his weakness, to ensure nothing goes wrong.

Already sounding overly familiar? Yes, that's right, with a huge cast attached & even stealing the tagline, Fool 'N' Final is a Desi version of Snatch.

Overall Impressions:
Well firstly does it stand up to Snatch? Not at all. Snatch hold up as one of my favourite films of all time & by comparison it's a joke. That said, I really think that is exactly what was intended. The whole film to be a big joke. It stands up to all the evolving hindi films today and reminds us of what used to be totally acceptable. It's parodying our own cinema. That's the way I interpreted it anyway. If this wasn't the intention, then 'Oh Dear'.

The film has a host of actors, but the ones who stand out are Johny Lever, Shahid Kapoor and Paresh Rawal. The comic timing between them keeps the film flowing, in fact I would say when non of them are on screen, the pace drops. Ayesha Takia pairs well with Shahid, but doesn't have much to do really, Sameera Reddy has even less to do.

Sunny Deol is playing his usual character whereby his one mukka (punch) will cause more damage than to be hit by a car & this will be liked by the main-stream Deol fans. The rest of the cast remain mere gap fillers and there are a lot of gaps to fill.

As a comical take on Snatch with over-the-top action and crazy additions that all defy logic, it holds up as mildly entertaining but nothing more.